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Recently, a group of community college two-year diploma shakers were hired on by a local pharmaceutical research firm to design new drugs for ailments ranging from depression to failing organs. When reached for comment, project manager Doctor Tack Bramnsonmann reached out for the team and stated,

When asked about the methods in question, Chedley nervously mixed a handfull of pills into his cup of coffee and stated “it’s tricky, you know, we’re working on patents and there’s so much proprietary information, we don’t want some of this getting out to soon.