Doktor Argus Q. Faux is an impatient asshole with a bad temper. He enjoys trash-talking children in free-to-play games and uploading footage of his birth to pornographic websites. When not engineering TFTS, he can usually be found crying on the bathroom floor and contemplating the use of MSG as a dietary supplement.
This week’s pennjillette is Reverend Couchsloth, who joins in the second half of the show to confirm Fidd’s spiritual diagnosis. Reverand [sic] peas [sic] can’t seem to stop talking about how tort reform will affect NASA. Doktor Faux blows bubbles into the microphone in an attempt to appeal to our five-to-nine-year-old demographic. Fidd looks into the show code and discovers that robot nipples are programmed to twist themselves. The unacceptable truth that the End Times of every religion have ALREADY HAPPENED on the SAME DATE IN THE PAST is revealed. All listeners to this episode will have the overdue balances Blockbuster accounts WIPED CLEAN. You’re welcome.
Tony Millionaire, of Maakies and Sock Monkey, joins Doktor Faux for a rare one-on-one cage-style conversation about aesthetics, old-world inspiration and Popeye cartoons. Tony explains the story of Marion’s Bicycle as well as an interesting tale of how to get your underground comic it’s own late-night television show (PROTIP: it’s hard). The two also geek-out over classic cartoons and the death of creator-driven content!
peas introduces Scoop McNewsgui, then introduces him again, and again, then the show attempts to start, then peas introduces Scoop McNewsgui. The hosts lie about how good the show is going to be, then peas introduces his new character, Scoop McNewsgui. After playing the first song of the show, “20th Century Newsgui” by The Scoops, peas workshops a new character and names him “Scoop McNewsgui”. The Blind Eye Segment turns out to be good, but it could’ve been better if it’d included some kind of reference to Scoop McNewsgui. Week 3 of Is It a Band is played, and Christ be damned if Scoop McNewsgui doesn’t join the show for the live post-game report. In the second half, peas comes out of nowhere with a hot new idea: a Slavic character named “Scoop McNewsgui”, an offering which single-handedly saves the show — not just for THIS episode, but for perpetuity in all possible universes. As usual, peas apologizes for the show at the end of the show, but somehow forgets to apologize for inventing Scoop McNewsgui. This episode is best listened-to with earplugs.
