Doktor Argus Q. Faux is an impatient asshole with a bad temper. He enjoys trash-talking children in free-to-play games and uploading footage of his birth to pornographic websites. When not engineering TFTS, he can usually be found crying on the bathroom floor and contemplating the use of MSG as a dietary supplement.
Doktor Faux returns to Hypercube, and to an empty HyperCOMM! Faux explores his inept ability to play video games, and ends up spending most of this episode trash-talking eight-year-olds on Team Fortnite 3. Doktor Cosmac arrives and encourages Doktor Faux to spare the virgin ears of today’s youth by playing Is It a Band with Caller23, Endika and YBDobbs.
Hypercube is INFESTED with rambunctious nerds as Joshua Rogers from Illuminated Paths joins Faux and peas for an interview about aesthetics. Joshua features his work with Viper (BOUT THA MONEY) and features work by Heliophonic and Twin Monoliths. Meanwhile, label members TTN are celebrating TTN Day inside the Hypercube, and it’s only a matter of time before they hijack the whole show and end up playing their cover of Totally Wired featuring Doktor Faux.
It’s Christmas, and Jesus doesn’t look a day over 1500. Papa Faux learns what a SubGenius is after discovering how easy it is to make Fidd take unidentified medication. Peas reveals the secrets he learned in “radio school”. The hosts do their famous “intro trick”, which is where they burn the first 75% of the show talking about what’s going to happen during the remaining 25%. Peas uses a month’s worth of cow lube and a battering ram to attempt to force a bit where Rudolph the Reindeer is a guest on the show (Teller was funnier). Inside jokes and references to past shows litter everything before the first song break. ISIS gets a pass in the spirit of the season during The Blind Eye, which is followed by a Scalpod-hosted round of Is It A Band. Both segments only take about three minutes each. Fidd announces the Is It A Band trading card series! After the final music break, the sacred on-air live sound check is consecrated, which is followed by a viewer mail segment in which less than half of the submissions are fake news — a new record! Peas talks about something he calls a “mustard poltriss”, which for some reason leads him not only into disclosing the secrets he learned as a Shriner and Mason in the Scottish and York rites (no shit), but also articulating a scholarly explanation of Kwanzaa before getting steamrolled by Fidd and Faux into apologizing for the entire show hereuntoforthwith. Fidd and peas are rightfully shitfaced by the end of the show — no further notes required.
