Episodes podcast timefortheshow

Ep 206: Lesbians Playing Quarter Notes on Djembes

Two comics who aren’t funny think they should be way more famous than they are. The twist is that they’re actually much more popular than they should be based on their talent levels. Not only are they not funny, they’re actually quite annoying. Peas is there, too.

Time for the Show 206

TFTS Relay 0-1-0-9-2-3
“Lesbians Playing Quarter Notes on Djembes”


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-Peas-O Box-


1// Dear Show,
When is the best time to brush your teeth?

Jill Biden of Cosby, Maryland

2// Dear Show,
Everytime I see a picture of Chevy Chase,
I feel a deep, boiling feeling inside of
my lower intestines that makes me want to
expel every last drop of stomach acid in
my body. Is this love?

Dea Arthur of No Relation, Iowa

3// Dear Show,
What is the best show on PBS to watch
while using my new penis-lengething

Squibble O'Hanrahan of Nooseknot, Oregon


What’s YOUR New Year’s Resolution, FIDD?

-Blind Eyes-

Who’s YOUR blind eye, peas?


Everyone knows i’m an afficionado of
Fine Cuisine. When not flipping fresh
fritatas in my french-handled frying-
pan, or peppering my hand-crafted party
pickles with precious and precariously
perused Pakistani spices, sometimes I
find myself bored with trying to figure
out which exotic dish to try and whip up

That’s where Big Black Smock comes in!
I receive three pre-packaged pallets of
semi-refrigerated foodstuffs every day,
each one an exciting adventure in entrees!

When I’m hungry, I just reach for a lukewarm
Big Black Smock and get ready to chow-down!
Just vigorously apply one stick of butter to
the exterior food-shaft and load into your
microwave for a patented thirteen minutes!
Big Black Smock meals are incredibly juicy,
jam-packed with protein and every one of
our trademark nine-inch meal-rods are filled
with a gooey cheese center.

If you’re looking for something mildly turgid
to wrap your greasy lips around, just drop
to your knees in thanks knowing that Big
Black Smock is ready to tickle your tonsils!

You can save three percent on your next
two-year subscription to Big Black Smock
with coupon code PEAS.

Act NOW and receive the Big Black Smock Straw,
so you can suck one down on the road, under your
desk, in court, at your nephew’s baseball game,
with your therapist or a discreet internet lover
anywhere and anytime!

Customers held liable for proper handling

  • Statutory Vape Laws (vaping in areas only designated as “non-smoking”)
  • Audience Jury from Last Week: FIDD is NOT GUILTY of Statuatory Vape

Peas and Faux must appeal to Judge Fidd.
One must defend an idea, and the other must oppose.
EITHER: Continue to hold peas liable for charges from previous weeks

Pick one of Tonight’s Topics:

  • The reintroduction of indentured servitude in the West
  • The Annexation of Kansas City
  • Mandated cesarian births
    Utah porn sniffing dog dies
    Unicyclist travels from Maine to Florida for charity
    Old Nazi map sparks treasure hunt in Netherlands
    River of melted butter spills into Wisconsin canal
    Hong-kong to lift hamster import ban
  • PATRONS for January 2023 –

Subject T. Change
Bob South
Michael MArcus
Hazel of the Windmills
Doktor Cosmac

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Argus Faux
Argus Faux
Doktor Argus Q. Faux is an impatient asshole with a bad temper. He enjoys trash-talking children in free-to-play games and uploading footage of his birth to pornographic websites. When not engineering TFTS, he can usually be found crying on the bathroom floor and contemplating the use of MSG as a dietary supplement.

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